Living with Tenacity
When a friend asked what word I was going to focus on going
into this year, I put some deep serious thought into my answer. After my
infertility battle started in 2017, I made “hope” my word for 2018. God knew I
needed an overhaul in that department. I left 2018 with a renewed hope in the
Father and what He has for my family.
This year
though—2019—what is it going to look like…?
I’m great
at painting a picture of what I want my life to look like—farm house, new job,
baby, husband employed… but dwelling on my wants, especially the ones I can’t
always control right now, takes my focus off what I can control. I become
negative and depressed over my circumstances, but thankfully my renewed hope holds
me back from this poisonous behavior. 2019 will be held loosely. I will control
what I can and surrender the rest to the Father with open hands.
My biggest fear is being 80 years old,
rocking on my front porch, having not accomplished any of my dreams and goals. All
I see is time lost, a life not well-lived. I fear complacency, but I let that
fear drive me. When I don’t feel like doing x, y, or z, I envision my fear. I’m
sitting on my same old little porch. I worked the same stressful job all my
life. I never had any adventures. I didn’t write any books. I didn’t run a
race. I didn’t fight the good fight. We didn’t foster or adopt. I didn’t take
risks. I stayed in my bubble, my comfort zone.
We move in the direction of complacency every moment we let slide by
without taking a step towards purpose. Steps might look like reading for 30
minutes a day, working out 3-5 times a week, or planning a Jamaican vacation. With every little step, we’re one action
closer to creating a habit and fulfilling a goal. My goal is to be 80 years
old on my back porch, looking out at the Blue Ridge Mountains while I reminisce
about all I did accomplish.
In 2019, I will change my momentum
and participate in my course. I will not
sit back in my sweats, coffee in hand, as I watch the year pass me by and sink
into depression when it does. Instead, 2019 is going to be filled with action,
determination, goals, and dreams. I will not give into laziness, fear,
disappointment, doubt, or any negativity that plagues me and my family. I will
grip every moment, day, and action firmly with determination. With tenacity.
Tenacity is “being able to grip
something firmly, being very determined.” When we grip something firmly, we
don’t let it go easily, at least not without a fight. We do need to have
balance between firmly gripping our days and goals all the while holding them
loosely. Sounds like an oxymoron, doesn’t it? We must be open to change or a
different direction that our path may take us. Maybe that means our path
changes part way through the journey, or that something bigger and better is
over the mountain. Either way, when we
fix our eyes on the Son and keep pressing through the muck, our lives are going
be changed for the better. Whether we reach the goal we started out with or
find a new one along the way, having the tenacity to take on each day
full-force will no doubt change anyone at the end of the year.
We only have 365 days, 8,760 hours,
and 31,536,000 seconds a year. Let’s
grip each day and fight for all it has to offer.
I’m going to be tenacious this year.
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